Monday, September 05, 2005

What's under a ponytail?

They say that bringing a child into the world is a beautiful journey...and it is...until you are postpartum.

Oh sure, there are plusses to not being pregnant anymore. Things like being able to sleep on your stomach and being able to see your own crotch again. These things have made me happy in ways you couldn't imagine. Very happy, very very happy...

But now I'm to the point in my postpartum where I'm shedding. My cat is jealous. I'm leaving a trail of hair, like spiders leave webs, behind me for my family to walk into. I've pulled stray hairs out of my baby's mouth, out of my family's meals, off of all static producing electrical devices. When I do laundry I don't empty lint out of the lint trap, I pull out mountain fresh Downy hair-wads.

They say that bald men have solar panels because they are love machines. Am I destined to become a love machine? I don't think I can manage love machine status with three kids. All I could ever aspire to is maybe the toaster level of love machine no matter how bald I get. Maybe, in 20 years, I'll get promoted to John Deere tractor status.

Kinda hairy for love machines, ain't they?


  1. ah yes, post-partum hair loss ....

    I swear, I could cover The Common Laws head about 5 times over with the amount of hair I shed on a daily basis!

    The joys of womanhood .....

  2. I remember the hair loss. Although, no body warned me about it first.

    I called everyone "I'm dying, I'm dying". "No, idiot your not" they said. It's normal.

  3. Yeah, but if you're nursing, you can squirt breast-milk across the room. *Serious* cool-bonus.... Congrats on your new babe.... :)

    (Yay! Another Becky's around...)

  4. Love this post...Post partium hair loss is something most women keep silent about, kind of like masterbation, in a way.

    I agree with becky above, you have your own watergun! Use it when necessary as a weapon for defense and protection!!!

  5. That picture is distracting me.

    I am unable to comment further.

  6. I've not heard about the hair-loss side effect before. Learned something new today. Congratulations on your new baby...I'm new so I didn't know that either. I'm catching up.


Absent Minded Archives