Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Xenu, Warrior Pimp

Last night Justin and I were remarking that there was finally some news on TV that was worth watching. We've all had our hearts touched by Katrina and those in the midst of it. This is real news, not the fluff that journalists tell us we should care about.

I'm betting that Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are firing their publicists right now for the loss of TV screen time. Damn those acts of god. Why Oprah, why???

Justin woke himself up this morning dreaming about Katie Holmes. Apparently that little tramp had agreed to marry my husband in his dream! Not only that, but she was jumping on a couch happy about it. She was going to bed my "all too willing to be seduced by celebrities" husband and show him her bewbies!

I can't believe I've been tossed on my housewifely ass for a dream enhanced starlet. She so fake bakes.

Oh Katie Holmes, you girl next door tart! Why do you attract my husband so? Sorry, dumb question, she is just so easily led!

Where is my fly swatter? I have to slap some thetans.

8 comments:

  1. I was laughing along with you until that last word...
    what the CRAP does that mean???

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thetans? They are the little aliens living inside all of us that are the cause of all our bad feelings, doubts and negativity. This is according to scientology. Xenu is the big alien dude that unleashed these nasties on the world. Down with thetans!

    ReplyDelete
  3. I was stumped on that one too. But, as usual I just smiled and nodded like I understood. Thank goodness Lisa asked.

    I'm right there with you on this one. My hubby loves Eva Longora, Sela Ward and his newest love - Kate Bosworth.

    That's ok. I'd leave him for Matthew McConaughy in a second - flat.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Your post made me laugh, as usual. u have a great blog here, and i so love your maid's uniform! ;-) I bet your hubby would like to see katie Holmes dressed like that! lol

    peace!

    NJ from NJ

    ReplyDelete
  5. LOL...But you, with your unique talents, can make a costume to look just like her!!

    I wish I had that talent, honestly.

    Be well.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Becky...remind him Jennifer Connelly is SO much better than Tom Cruises' beard KH.

    and you are so much better than them both.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Wow...those scientologists make the Mormons sound...RIGHT. hahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (what...the funny farm, you say? coming? to take me...AWAY? good. lemme just grab my book.)

    ReplyDelete

Absent Minded Archives