Monday, June 18, 2007

Scissoring makes me hot.


I'm running behind...

June's Bestest Housewifely Doodad? Kitchen scissors! I use them to cut off that ugly bit of gristle at the end of raw chicken breasts.

My pair broke. They were cheap and I abused them. I am going to buy better ones. I'm going to buy kitchen scissors that can be used to butcher whole sides of beef. I'm going to buy kitchen scissors that will slice through cans of Spam. I'm going to buy kitchen scissors that are lithe enough to circumcize gnats!

I'm drawing the line at using my kitchen scissors for amateur taxidermy on webcam, for fun and profit. The chocolate brown lab, that belongs to my neighbor, who craps on my lawn? He's safe for now...

A person can put their beef, spam and gnat foreskin encrusted scissors in the dishwasher, open, and they should come out sparkling clean. This is especially important after cutting raw meats of any sort. Germs from meat juice have this way of making a person feel a little woogie. Spam is cooked, true, but that makes a person feel woogie too.

You should be buying your kitchen scissors at real department stores instead of at the dollar store like I did. Buying two pair might be a nifty idea. One pair for meat and processed meat products and another pair for produce.

Thank you kitchen scissors. I like you, I really like you.

***

Happy Fathers Day to those whom it applies. I hope you all had swell weekends.

4 comments:

  1. I love kitchen scissors. I sometimes cut pizza with mine. They work way better than those rolly pizza cutter things.

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  2. My mother-in-law uses her kitchen shears for everything including cutting pizza. I got my first pair a few months ago, as part of a Wüsthof knife set. Haven't used 'em for meat yet, because the accompanying knives handle that just fine.

    Allow me to put in a good word for top-quality knives, even just a couple of them. They cut SO much better than my cheap knives. They are a pleasure to use.

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  3. Beckster, get some kitchen shears that can be taken apart and put in the dishwasher to clean. I have some that will even cut through a penny. They are made by Cutco,,, and they are still hot. I had to check out the maker's name shown on them and they were still in our dishwasher drying, lol.

    Erf

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