Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Morning Minutia VI

The best way to make sure you've eaten all the raisins in your bowl of raisin bran is to dump the contents of the bowl onto the couch and then systematically look through it.

I reserve the right to wear sweats during sex this winter.

I did not steal my children's winter coats. The ditsy checker at the store left those damned magnetic tags the coats when I bought them and no one stopped us at the door when we set off the buzzers. Therefore they are MY tags and I can use my Dremel tool to hack them off.

The most exciting item on my list this Christmas is a Crock Pot. Mine broke. If you can't figure out why this is exciting you need to think outside of the crock. I reserve the right to wear sweats while I use my Crock Pot this winter.

I'm feeling the urge to cut my very long hair again.

I am not a ninja.

I do not like this new brand of coffee in my coffee maker. It doesn't smell like coffee. It smells like cat pee. Tastes OK though.

Who is hanging out in my neighbor's house during the day, when she's gone, blasting bass speakers? Should I go knock on the door and tell whoever is inside that it's rattling the decor on my walls?

9 comments:

  1. The brilliant part about slow-cooking food in a Crockpot is that you can sex in your sweats while the food is cooking. Then when you emerge from your Den of Passion with a hearty appetite, the food is ready.

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  2. You do realize that if you put milk on said cereal before said dumping on said sofa for systematic searching for raisins, it will eventually smell like barf?

    Is there a hole in your sweats?

    The tags could be a fashion statement. Plus they'll always look new. Cool. Kids won't think so. Kids are like that.

    Crock pots rule. Don't forget to remove the skin and hair of your cat before cooking.

    Cut your hair. Post a picture.

    Cat piss coffee is unappetizing and I don't care how it tastes.

    Things were shaking and attempting to fall off my wall this morning; different reason!

    Meggy

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  3. I have a brand new unused crockpot...had it for over one year now...honestly I don't know what I'm waiting for to use it. Awhile ago it was most likely because thinking abut putting raw meat and veggies into the thing while trying shake a hangover might have something to do with it.

    (visit Stupid Tom while I pretend to be too busy to blog)

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  4. I'd be leary about that raisin checking method. Sweats are good almost everywhere but I think in the activity you mentioned, less is better. Are those tags useful for anything else other than setting off those alarms? Short hair is easier to take care of. No hair is even easier but you would look odd. Who is a ninja? I wonder if Bad Ass Coffee is available via mail order? I'd dump that other stuff. Maybe your neighbor's kids think she will need a sound beacon to find the house when she comes home? I'd knock on her door when she is home and talk to her. I doubt those making the noise would care what you think about it.

    Wow, that wasn't too hard! Now lets solve the rest of the worlds problems!

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  5. One wonders if Justin will get the hint to buy u a Crock Pot for Christmas. In so doing, he would get kitchen sex all winter long, no doubt.

    Wearing a sweater while having kitchen sex works for me. Besides it helps keep the grease off. In most other places i tend to agree with dick.

    Keep the hair a bit longish if u feel u have to trim it thats ok but who am i to say. The floral head dress still works well.

    After reading about your coffee, i will be turned off coffee for an entire 5 minutes.

    Is someone at your neibours place starting a band?

    Erf

    (the word verification was difficult with my dyslexic typing skills)

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  6. I'm gonna turn that damned word verifcation off.

    I told my mother about the crock pot. Justin can now buy me adult novelties and bubble bath.

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  7. I'm so disappointed. About the ninja thing.

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  8. Sweats are overrated Becky. Especially during sex.

    Just makes you all the more sweatier and then who would want you using the CDrock Pot in them thangs?

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  9. I would be so grateful if you turned the word verification thing off. It's gotten longer and longer and half the time I have to repeat it. I hate the hummer.

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