Wednesday, October 01, 2008

The future will be better tomorrow.

Election 2020...I'm running for Vice President. Or maybe even 2016 if I get my butt in gear.

Last night I was voted into my homeowner's association presidency. I got my choice of actually being the big cheese or just the vice president and I chose the lesser of two evils. You may call me Madame HOA Vice President. Or Mistress Lilith for you naughty little boys.

When I was a little girl I remember dreaming those pink fuzzy little girl dreams about growing up, getting married, having lots of babies, living in a cute little house with a cute little fence and then putting myself in a position where I have to listen to my neighbor's parking disputes.

There is also some dramatic quarrelling about whose trash can goes where and what not. I can't wait to get elbows deep into that one.

I figure if I play my cards right that I can move from a leadership role in my HOA to the city council...then onto mayor of my town, population 5000...then governor of Nevada...Then Vice President of these United States baby!

And I won't have any of those nagging doubts about my fertility because I voluntarily ended it. No silly placenta fueled scandals and my sons can't get pregnant!

What I'm finding unfair about Sarah Palin's press coverage lately is the splashing about of that photo of her in pageant swimwear. Do any of you really care about this? The woman wore a swimsuit that covered what it needed to cover. (Google that. I ain't linking it.) I'm sure that at some point Barack and Joe and John have worn swimwear that covered their bits and no one is getting themselves worked up about that. None of them got into water and melted.

When I get nominated for Vice President of the United States of America I sure hope people see me wearing this:



And this:



And this:



Because that's my stand on the issues.

And my opinion about parking.

And that's the covering of my bits.

5 comments:

  1. In order for me to call u mistress or even madame u have to be wearing a leather outfit, and i dont see one here, lol

    Love the first pic, from the angle of the pic the lower part looks like a tongue!

    Anyways, u got my vote whatever good that will do ya.

    Have fun with the neighbours. Are u going to be assigned the task of finding out whose dog poop on whose lawn?

    Erf

    ReplyDelete
  2. If I vote for you, will you help me circumvent all those nasty zoning laws so I can conduct genetic experiments in my backyard oilfield ?

    ReplyDelete
  3. If I vote for you, will you help me circumvent all those nasty zoning laws so I can conduct genetic experiments in my backyard oilfield ?

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hey.

    That stripper outfit.

    I think I gave you money before.

    If I remember correctly, you were trying to pay your way through school and you liked me.

    ReplyDelete

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