Wednesday, December 03, 2008

Hot, hairy and fluffy.

Some of these celebrities just ain't funny.

I've needled my husband for the last fifteen minutes for names of celebrities he thinks are hot, so I can make fun of them and through that make fun of him. Justin has given me the names of two very attractive celebrities which I've nixed because there is nothing to make fun of. They are decidedly dull. Talented and lovely, but dull.

Even his eyes glaze over when talking about their upper body anatomies.

I've threatened to pick one out for him. He's threatened in turn to fart in bed and throw the covers over my head.

Funny, his eyes started to sparkle at that notion. Justin tells me that if I ever am on the receiving end of a dutch oven that the honeymoon is over. Then, as if to emphasize the point, he put a movie in the DVD player and began to watch little men with hairy feet battling cave trolls and orcs.

It was in watching Frodo's impending doom when Justin offered up a celebrity I can work with. Hopefully she won't mind being referenced with hairy feet. She doesn't seem very hairy to me but you never know. The rich and famous have access to hair removal and photoshopping that I only dare dream of someday.

My husband thinks Julia Stiles is hot.


My husband would never fluff the covers over Julia...ever...not even if she begged.

He's not yet done such a thing to me but that's not really the point is it?

You know Julia Stiles. She's that deep thinking artsy girl in all those deep thinking artsy girl movies. She has a quizzical brow and no use for upper body undergarments.

I also found this photo of Julia, which I sort of prefer in light of my husband's wizard induced crushy poo.


Here is Julia starring in "The Omen 666", dangling her petite hairy toesies off a ledge. That large white scarf covers her up a hell of a lot better than that teeny red one. I don't see a belly button anywhere.

Oh Julia Stiles, you badly rhymed sonnet spouting tart! Why do you attract my husband so? Sorry, dumb question, I don't find you dull so it's only logical that Justin wouldn't find you dull either.

Those Jason Bourne movies are kinda awesome even if they do make me a little motion sick.

And if Justin can't choose a tart next time, I'm choosing Matt Damon, Lord of the Rings or not. Matt's worth a little fluff.

7 comments:

  1. Well I guess Justin's chicks are okay but I'll stay with Goldie Hawn. Of course I am a couple of years older than Justin. Just a couple.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Dick:

    WTF?!?!

    I'd fuck Goldie Hawn but I wouldn't be happy about it.

    (lie)

    Julia Stiles is a 7 out of 10 on bangability.

    Anything above a 4 is worthy of my Mr. Wiggly.

    This criteria falls to a 3 if you can guarantee me that you have a vagina.

    ReplyDelete
  3. While I'm not really a big fan of hairy feet...I have to side with Justin.

    She's freakin' HOT.

    Oh, and Matt Damon is gay. That's what I heard.

    I'm just sayin....

    ReplyDelete
  4. Ya, but I'm pretty sure Julia likes chicks.

    ReplyDelete
  5. That doesn't bother my husband in the least...no it doesn't.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I thought you had dedicated this post to me, I am hot, hairy and fluffy!

    Cheers.

    did I tell you i am having daily sex? :-D

    ReplyDelete
  7. Woohoo, daily sex! With whom? Heh.

    ReplyDelete

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