Tuesday, February 24, 2009

My hot flashes are the cause of global warming.

I heard through the grapevine that a male relative of mine disbelieves that women are affected negatively by their ever fluctuating levels of hormones and that it's only an excuse for poor behavior. That it's something they made up to lord themselves over men.

I can concede that for some women this is true.

But for me, this morning, this week before my body begrudgingly has a period, this entire blog span of being absent-minded, I think I can freely tell anyone that thinks this way that I have a full carton of soy milk and it wouldn't bother me to pour the entire contents of it over your head.

It's either that or stick the contents of a Sam's Club size box of mini-pads on your car.


  1. Question: Is the "male relative of mine," also know as your husband?

    I certainly hope he knows better than to even talk to u at this time!


  2. I hope that carton of soy milk is well past its sell-by date so it's really ripe.

    Your male relative is right. Women made up PMS to exert their power over men. This explains why well more than half of our senators, congresspeople, and governors, and presidents are female, and why most large corporations are run by female executives. The plot has been super effective! He is so smart to have figured it out, though, because I thought we covered our tracks pretty well.

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  4. He has doubts that PMS exsists? A good reply would be "C'mere and say that..."

  5. Hormones sounds like 'whore moans.'




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