Monday, February 28, 2011

Shining up my stretch marks.

On the day after the Oscars I usually present my own best and worst dressed picks.  None of the other "red carpet" events matter.  I like the Oscars.  Lady Gaga in an egg at the Grammys only gets a passing nod in my subconcious.

...And, on the last day of February I usually declare it "Naked Housework Day!" and encourage my readers and other hangers on to remove their clothing and scrub something dirty.  Dust your ceiling fan in the buff.  Wipe your baseboards in the nude.  Shine your mirrors and enjoy the view.

So how does one merge Oscar fashion with industrious nudity?

One can't.  The Oscar post will have to wait until later.  I'mma gonna let my freak dishrag fly.

Yeah, I'm turning up my heat and  I'm not answering my doorbell until approximately 2:50 PM.


UPDATE @11:07 AM:  I've decluttered my bedroom.  My cat barfed on my bedspread so that's in the washer.  I've decluttered my bathroom.  And I've organized some of my art supplies.  Not recommended, going into the garage to put things away on shelves.  The cold made my butt clench.

UPDATE @1:03 PM:  Salami and cheese sandwich for lunch along with a small bowlful of cheesy puffs.  No sleeves or hems of shirts to wipe off cheesy fingers.  Really inconvenient.

UPDATE @2:44 PM:  Dressed after naked document shredding.  This is for those of you at work, where nakedness isn't appropriate, invited or encouraged.  Time to get the kiddies from school.  I may do this naked thing again tomorrow if I have no reason to venture into my garage.

3 comments:

  1. My boobs protesteth. I could be down with naked lay on couch and catch up on old episodes of The Golden Girls day. Is that an option?

    ReplyDelete
  2. If you insist on being on the couch, reach down between the cushions, grab whatever you find there, stick it in a nearby dirty dish or under a rug or in your pocket, then you can claim you cleaned!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Does your garage have any windows? If so, you might want to reconsider that nakedness in the garage thing. And OUCH @ naked document shredding. If I tried that something other than my tie might get caught in the shredder!

    Erf

    ReplyDelete

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