Thursday, June 28, 2012

You can prevent forest fires but you can't prevent stupid.

For the last week I've been really enjoying my well I should...because most every other place here in the west is dry and bursting into flame.  I'm back here now enjoying the odors of my neighbor burning grilling meat more than likely slathered in barbecue sauce.  Amazingly, my other neighbor is not blowing all her cigarette smoke out of her back door because it finally got hot enough for her to turn on her central air.  She smokes Camels.  I'm sure of it.

So, for the moment, the air is sweet and lovely, but it's still dry, and the population has been warned to not engage in activities that cause Smokey the Bear to have panic attacks.

The weather lady on my favorite news channel (the one that is on in the afternoon and not the one that I like to call Squarehead Weatherpants because she has a geometric hairdo) said that there were around 420 fires in my area and that 393 of them were caused by humans.

She did not make a note of how many of those 393 fires were an accident and which ones were caused by dumb humans.  My guess is that more than half were caused by the dumb sort and now my home town is breathing in carcinogenic levels of smoke and ash because them.

I have no tips for my readers and other hangers on about how to prevent fires except for one.  That is, don't cause really hot things to touch dry tinder-like things in the out of doors, even if you think you are the smartest and most fire responsible individual on God's less than green Earth.

Next week my family goes camping in the Nevada high desert.  It'll be dry but I promise, we will be careful.  We have to be.  There are no emergency services for 200 miles.  No cell phone reception either.  Plenty of donkeys though.  Our campfires will be small, in designated campfire receptacles, with two water filled five gallon buckets nearby at the ready.

If Northern Nevada explodes, it won't be my fault.

Blame that one on my neighbor.  The temps will go down eventually.


  1. We are still waiting for summer to arrive here in the NW. Yesterday our local high temp actually reached 71, then it clouded over and we had rain overnight. The local radio station just said today's high should again be 71 which is better than the 69 the Seattle TV station said last night we would have today.

    My oldest son comes home in a couple of weeks from his Navy deployment in the Middle East where they have been having daily high temps around 120 with another ten degrees higher on the flight line. He will probably freeze here with our current temps.

  2. There's a lot I miss about Northern Nevada. Just...not the fires. Everything is miserable about the fires.

    Hope you're having a great time camping!


Absent Minded Archives