Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Shine a light upon your filth...

There is a great list of evils on this planet.  Some parts of this list is up for moral debate and engaging in that debate makes us all greater human beings. 

Some parts of that list requires no debate.  The evil is evident.

It was evident yesterday in Boston.  We can debate (without much evidence as of yet) if it was a act of terrorism or not, but the intent itself was evil.

It is evident today with the announcement that the Westboro Baptist Church plans on picketing the funerals of the victims of the bombing in their effort to urge the government to reinstate the death penalty for homosexuality.

Today many folks on the Facebooks have posted this graphic in response.

I'm pretty sure it's illegal to mail unprocessed animal feces no matter how many plastic bags you wrap it in.  Don't do it.  It's bad.

However, that doesn't mean there isn't a whole passel of goodies we can send those Westboro eejits there in Topeka!

- Clean and unpackaged marital aids.  Don't use them first and don't send the naughty graphics on the packaging.  Just send them a nice BOB without the first B.  Make them hunt down their own AA cells.  Or D cells.  Or watch batteries.  Size doesn't matter.

- The complete box set of "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy" or "Ellen" or "Will and Grace" or "Magnum P.I." 

- Lingerie.  Clean lingerie.  Clean lingerie you picked up at the bargain store.  The itchy lime green tacky variety.

- Your old leaky bong.  Again, clean.  Clean your bong and send it along. 

- Printed materials from other religious affiliations.  I grew up in Utah.  You know how that goes.

- Your office shreddings.  Tax day was yesterday...shred with a happy heart!

- Used clothing of mixed fibers.  You have an old cotton/polyester sweater in the back of your closet?  Wash that bastard and stick it in a box.  Don't send a live lobster.

- Prunes.  In intact store packages.  Prunes are good for you.  Loosens things right up.

- Any books written by the following authors:  Emily Post, Charles Darwin, Stephen Hawking, David Sedaris, Alfred Kinsey, Madonna, G.W.F. Hegel, Walt Whitman.

Actually, I don't expect to send the Westboro Baptists anything really.   Poo or no poo. 

They aren't worth the stamp.

ETA April 17, 2013:  Anonymous hacked Westboro's Facebook Page and left the awesome:

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