Wednesday, September 24, 2014

I'd rather spread the wealth.

It's arrived right on schedule.  School started a month ago.  The snot started flowing last weekend.

My husband brought the snot home.  He's a teacher.  Snot is part of the job.

Throughout this week he's hacked and coughed and snorted and otherwise dealt with snot.  He was bad enough off to ask the pharmacist to sell him the good medicine kept behind the counter lest the meth heads get a hold of it.

He took a couple pills, they worked as they should, and then he felt a little frisky. 

Cold medicine is an aphrodisiac.  Romance is more romantic without snot but apparently germ transfer happens regardless.

Today I started in on the sneezing and the sore throat.  By tonight I will be fully immersed in snot.  By Sunday I will be a dried and crusted human petri dish.

Cold medicine does not make me feel frisky.  When I take cold medicine I shouldn't drive or operate heavy machinery.  Even running my hair dryer might be a bigger risk than I should take.

So, if I start talking about farts and sex on Facebook, know that's me on my healthy days...but if I start up on conspiracy theories and Tea Party idolatry, you know that I took something in an effort to start breathing again.

Geez, I hope I can breathe.  For the love of all that is holy, I hope I can breathe.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Absent Minded Archives